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艾易艾斯(aeas)写作范文欣赏 (10)议论文(7-9)

本期写作范文欣赏要跟各位家长和学生分享艾易艾斯(aeas)写作中的常考题型:议论文体写作。 这个题目结合着现代生活中“孤独”这样一个社会问题,因而从解题、文章构思到论点陈述,都给考生带来不小难度。学生们在解题时应充分利用题目设定的背景信息来分析题目要求;构思方面可以充分结合日常生活,启发思考恰当切题的观点;在陈述方面,学生应该明确议论文需要使用正式的词汇和表达,再结合不同句型,以及同义表达替换来凸显学生的语言运用能力。

Topic: People can experience loneliness for all sorts of reasons; for example, no one hangs out with the new boy who has just moved to your neighbourhood.

What do you think are some good ways to cheer up a lonely person?

In the modern society, many people can feel lonely for various reasons. Feeling lonely is not good for a person’s health and wellbeing. So we need some effective ways to help lonely people walk out of their loneliness.

There are several ways that can help cheer up lonely people. First, we can invite the lonely people to join our routine outgoings. For example, we can invite them to go shopping with us or to go for a walk in a local park. In this way, the lonely people can enjoy our company, and this can reduce their sense of loneliness. However, we should invite them regularly instead of once off. Second, we can listen to the stories behind those who feel lonely. No matter how small the story is, I think every lonely soul wants to be listened to. If we listen to them, they will feel that they are understood and valued by us. We can give them some advice for their problems after we

listen to their stories. In addition, we can also share our experience with them, so that they may understand that everyone can have different problems in their life.

Although there are many ways to deal with loneliness, I believe the small yet helpful ways are to invite them to join our daily outgoings and to listen to the stories of the lonely people.

教师点评:考场分数16-18分

* 这篇文章首先做到了议论文体的严格缜密的格式要求:第一段:介绍话题背景,转述话题以及提出自己观点。第二段:议论段的观点陈述和论证,做到有效地支持自己的观点 。第三段:总结论述,再次强调自己的观点,从第一段到最后一段,构成一个逻辑说理圈,严密而有说服力。

* 文章的论点明确,请参见划线句子 。三个句子言简意赅地提出了作者的2个论点,而且铺排条理清晰,非常符合议论文的结构要求。

* 文章体形了较高的文字驾驭能力:例如1. 同义词汇替换例如various 替换了all sorts of;2. 主动语气和被动语气句式交替使用;3. 生动表达:walk out of, lonely soul等的运用增加了文章的生动性。

* 对于7-9年级的考生,如果能做到以上几点,考分预估在16分以上。

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