艾易艾斯（aeas)写作范文欣赏 （四）冒险故事（7-9）

本期写作范文欣赏要跟各位家长和学生分享一篇冒险故事的作文，adventure这个类型的文章跟creative writing 最大的不同之处在于，adventure往往要记叙真实发生的或者基于真实事件改编的惊险或者探索类的事件，例如，去丛林探险、海底探险等，在英国文学中《罗宾逊漂流记》是探险类文学的代表作，推荐有时间的学生阅读。相反，creative writing 想象类文章往往需要写非真实的虚拟事件，《变形记》是这一题材的典范，也推荐学生们阅读。

Writing topic: Describe an adventure you made in the past.

Kate’s Deep Sea Fishing Adventure

Last summer, Kate and her family went deep sea fishing on a cool, cloudy day. When they drifted far from shore in a big boat, Kate fished with the blue fishing pole. She fished for hours, but she didn’t catch anything. Her big brother didn’t catch anything either, but her father caught a small fish.

Suddenly a storm blew in. Crash! Waves crashed over the sides. Kate was soaked.

“The boat is sinking!” the captain cried. “Everyone in the lifeboat!”

Kate ran to the raft. She jumped in, and her family climbed in, too. They lowered the lifeboat. Splash!

Rain poured like crazy! The boat tossed about. Then Kate saw a fin. “Shark!” she cried. She pointed nervously. Her mom gasped.

Just then another boat came near. “Hang on! We will help you!” their captain shouted.

Soon they were all on the new boat and heading back toward shore. It finally stopped raining, and the storm clouds blew away. By the time they landed at the dock, the sun was shining again. Kate was glad her adventure was finally over, and everyone was safe. (189字)

教师点评：考场分数17-19 分

* Adventure文章最重要的是设置情节，例如主人翁、时间地点等。这篇文章第一段就把情节设置做好了。

* 文章中划线的3个句子言简意赅地把Adventure的开始、发展和结局都设置得非常清晰。

* 词汇使用，尤其是拟声和动作动词的使用，非常丰富恰当。短句和长句的变换使用加强了文章的惊险效果。文章虽然短小，但是冒险故事的惊醒动魄已经跃然纸上，对读者而言是一个愉快的阅读体验